i've been discord diarying a lot more lately

mostly so i can flesh out my thoughts more freely with respect to danii, it's important for me to think about us in a less exposed environment

i'm also aware im dedicating an inordinate amount of time thinking about it and i'm not so sure how to evaluate that. I'm excited and apprehensive and wary about both of those emotions. our relationship is this really satisfying split of playful and serious.

it's just really clever and fun and intelligent and reflective and kind in a way i respect. it's nice to respect someone like that, and it's nice to respect it in particular given my less than respectful treatment in the past

respect is a more important concept to me than admiration right now