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it's actually really nice to go out to restaurants with a friend or friends where they eat and i just get to hang out. i've been able to experience that a fair amount in the past half year and i can think of a few reasons why i appreciate it:
- one of the only social activities where it's socially acceptable for the main mental stimulation to just be one another's company. i prefer just to chat, but some people can get bored or think its weird to not be doing Something. i hate activities. this way, they get an activity and i get my convo
- slower pace of interaction, and breaks are acceptable. food is an activity for downtime in conversation and people aren't weird about it. i have more time to put my thoughts together while they eat.
- when with multiple people, i get more chances and opportunities to talk. if i'm really into a topic, i can engage lots of people at once and i can dominate the convo without it being so much of an imposition

i think the reason i have been so emotionally impressed by this is because previously, my family and friends got really weird with me not eating. probably because they knew me pre-eating disorder, or at least were around when it arose.
super judgemental and worried about me the entire time, blegh. it's nice to be around ppl that can just be like "oh that's just what she's like" and move on.
of course, there are still lots of drawbacks: - it's still food lol, can be really gross to watch and smell and be around. especially if its meat.
- still going out. i'm better than i used to be by a long shot, but it's defi not my preference for environment. - sometimes people can use the food or the surroundings as convo inspiration. shallow and dull, kill me
- i feel kinda trapped there, even when i'm uncomfy. ig i've never really tried to leave in the middle, but that kinda supports my point