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job has fucked up how i msg ppl online which is rly sad bc it used to be my fav mode of communication
now feels instrumental, like I’m checking off boxes and desperately trying to keep my to inbox clear
i knew things like this would happen but it’s still incredibly depressing having my personality carved and mangled into docility and productivity
i don’t care that I’m more “outgoing” in some cases and that it has some benefits. Like yeah I’ve acquired some new powers of course, but at the expense of crowding out others, and these powers are not primarily serving my interests. pro-sociality is cancer, i want to go back home. not safe here.