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at my core i'm the same person i was 8 years ago
the egyptianism of my desires is disappointing, and they are locked in place by being indexed to my idea of freedom.
since i will never escape the material conditions that cause me to strive for freedom in this lifetime, i will not have the opportunity to overcome this inadequate instantiation of an inadequate concept.
it's notable how in my more ornery states of being, when given a modicum of room to breathe, i slot myself quite cleanly into a comfortable masculinist mode