i think i’m being contradictory in a counterproductive way. i’m scared of clarity. im scared of permanence. things are changing around me and im struggling to keep up. like ollie is gone from normal bsky operations and i dont know how to handle that.

i can’t be passive with others but that’s all i want rn. and if i wanna get to space where i can actually be passive with others it feels like i have to make irrecoverable changes to the structure of our relationship and that sucks

idk what to do w dinah or annie rn, and thinking too concretely makes me nauseous. eva and aurora are weird cases. hailey is a perpetual oddity. i miss anna but i fucked things up. cinny is complex but i like that we’re tight when we talk. kasey kat is poggers. im glad muen and i don’t hang anymore

but it’s kinda rough if that’s the destiny of all my relationships

i’m still sorry danii

i don’t really like your friends tho