Alright I’m gonna try to write my thoughts out. So she’s been on my mind more often recently, and I think that’s best explained by an initial thought and then bc it’s recent brain can associate fresh things with. But still I think sorting through feelings on will be important

And useful. So first thing that I think is most informative is somewhat mixed reaction to thinking about meeting her again. I think this was caused by me thinking about how many months left in year or something. Anyway usually it’s very hopeful or positive thoughts, like I miss

Her. And I think that missing feeling has gone away, at least the most visceral feeling of like something feeling off/lacking without her. Like I have thought about her lots less bc I just didn’t really need to yk. I think that’s a positive thing like feeling dependent sucks

Not like being dependent on others is bad bc obv we all are, just like it’s healthy to not NEED someone around when that’s not possible type.