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how horrendous tbh, really tragic. totally not my comfort zone or vibe. if all alone i think things can be super super incredible, like going for a walk at night when no ones around and feeling wind or watching things happen, hell i even feel it walking around downtown
but socially is a big question mark for me, almost always ruins it for me, even if its someone i like. just can't get into the right headspace ig. again coming back to how small of doses i can handle of these type of things before getting burnt out.
ok real last thing: pets :/ sorry i dont think you should kill them but yeah not really a big nonhuman animal guy. also the ethics are weird but im not like hardline, i just have some questions, and it gets weirder if species is hardcore domesticated. idk i can't stand sharing
alright prob way past time to wrap this up. in conclusion, i think ive grown a lot on a ton of different areas, and that feels really good. im not so much interested ultimately in my compatibility with her as much im interested in seeing how ive changed over time.
the areas in which ive improved are good for me regardless of what relationships i have in my life, which is super wonderful imo. there are somethings that ive had minimal movement on, but these are mostly particular things relating to her interests and passions, however
widespread/common/universal these interests might be for many people. ultimately not *too* concerned about this, but still something worthy of consideration. lots of my interests and passions are highly individualistic, so this can make relationships difficult with people who
have expectations/desires for more social interaction. that might sound like a basic problem, but the degree to which it impacts me is pretty serious. even activities i would normally enjoy like anime or gaming become a chore with others around, and thats really rreally rough
ultimately not a super big worry, i don't need romantic or partner style relationships to feel fulfilled completely, just something very important to keep in mind when creating relationships, especially bc i def think ill want some relationships
i made a note to myself as i was writing to not just diminish my worth and i think thats important to end on. i have a lot of personal quirks and some of them may be things to spend time investigating and resolving if they are harmful, but
my uniqueness doesn't have to be something i apologize for. i enjoy my individuality! i enjoy who i am! i have strong dispositions and perspectives on lots of personal things that are highly incompatible to most others, but thats okay! i am an ever changing socially enmeshed
being with multiplicity and particularity that can't be reduced or confined. i am beautiful. :)