"i agree with some implicit propositions of a yet-to-be-written rational reconstruction of a historical tradition and have benefited from my engagement with its literature" doesn't hit the same.

the whole joke of arriving at correct conclusions with horrible reasoning is genuinely torturous, especially when my primary concern is theoretical (i know its impolite to admit it, but i have no aspirations to activism or organization*).

*which i'm more than aware is not negligible, not just as a moral imperative but as something with theoretical import, but the state of available actionism is blatantly insufficient, misguided, and theoretically confused

this also fails to capture the nature of my rejection and the complicated aesthetic and affective relation i have to historical figures, methodological principles, personal motivations/dispositions, even argumentative rejoinders

in any case, formative immersion is just a difficult thing to shake. as cliche as it is, anarchism feels underdeveloped and naive, but for entirely opposite reasons than typically given.

ever since first becoming politically aware i've felt my adhesions to be gradually shifting directionally the same way, and whatever it is i'm expressing here, it doesn't feel like a violation of that trend