Can be incredibly destructive. I will neglect many of my responsibilities [not quite responsibilities as such, since I go out of my way to possess as few obligations as possible, frequently to a pathological degree. Not sure why this is in brackets considering it’s actually one of the main bits of

fallout from 4]. In order to facilitate my less than predictable obsession schedule, I will eschew as much commitment ahead of time as possible to other activities or people. I don’t want to be respecting a promise, I want to be doing the shit my brain is telling me Has To Happen Now. Weakness maybe

That’s enough reasons for now, I’m running out of steam a bit. To loop back around to *quickly: it’s kindaaa not quite right, because I take a while to get comfy and familiar before diving in and getting completely taken away all of the sudden. Like a calm river snapping into turbulent choppy rapids

But yeah despite all the negatives it feels really stupid to want anything else. I could attempt to cultivate different desires, but why? I like not being tied down right now, and I don’t mind not having a ton of friends (I kinda prefer it). I enjoy losing myself in my passions and leaning into it.

I’d prefer not to make people around me uncomfortable if I can help it, and that’s maybe something to improve on and workshop, but I think communicating clearly and early and often can help mitigate some things. Idk, still learning. But don’t feel like intentionally attempting to change myself atm.

It’s interesting though - while more and better communication can help with many of the above, with 3 it’s basically the opposite prescription. Like sure an overall heads up is good, but I have a tendency to constantly self reflect and if I’m telling you about it all the time when I’m obsessed and