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i really dislike the person i am now
once again convinced that quietism is my only obligation
The only thing that can perhaps be said is that the good life today would consist in resistance to the forms of bad life that have been seen through… other than this negative prescription no guidance can be envisaged.
adorno, the problems of moral philosophy, 168

this is not some retarded “no ethical consumption under capitalism” shit, this is cause for agonizing and active despair for any step you make. suicide would be the correct solution, if it were not so self-serving.