Bloom Into You is giving me the opportunity to look into asexual and aromantic stuff more and its so interesting! like sex favorable asexuals are so fascinating and its super freeing to have this understanding to describe things

guitar riffs can make me feel the most intense emotions

I go through these periods where my head is just so full and I feel paralyzed from doing anything. I'm tired out from something (in this case, finishing classes) and I want to relax, but its hard. There's this sort of moral anxiety where I can't let myself enjoy media

because everythings just infected with gross immoral shit like on so many levels. I can't turn of the critical analysis part of my brain. Even though I value that and think its important I'd like to just chill out sometimes

The only other option from commercialized gross shit is lefty stuff but that also makes me critically think too :/ I struggle to relax

nevermind i found horimiya and both mcs give me so much gender euphoria (could do without the queerbating tho wish theyd just commit)

the opening to episode 10 😐gay shit is treated like a joke its so annoying it could actually be cool. also the monogamy based drama is weird - still a super super cute show tho

lol im doing what i complained about at the start of this thread but now im enjoying it

nyquil fucks my sleep so much no sleep all night so tired but body doesn't recognize sleep signal bc medicine does!!! teehee

alternatively, spurious correlation but idk i feel like this happened to me before

bruh how am i still sick. this shit sucks

Oscar Pollock is so fucking hot omg

i feel like i only like AMAB ppl that are at least somewhat queer. idk what to make of that, cishet guys just boring ig

also complicated to disaggregate gender euphorbia and attraction lol

(Btw example of state having some positive effect: keeping serial rapist out of community. We can do lots to alleviate material conditions preventatively, but things like that will still occur. There can be solutions to this without being as cruel as prison, and it would be more

Effective at rehabilitation and restoration. However, it cannot be denied that the state can handle this niche case by at minimum preventing further cases. Don’t pretend like “it just won’t happen lol” or “self defense lol” - deal with the challenge)

Are alternatives, sometimes people just categorically rule out that the state can have any positive impact. This isn’t to say that a state is necessary, but pretending doesn’t do any good. You’ll give lackluster responses to important questions and that everything will just work

Out. I can agree that morally speaking anarchism has incredibly strong foundations, it’s just a matter of working (wink) to discover the best approaches to achieve those ends. Ultimately in some cases the practical reality may preclude the idealism, but there must be a constant

Effort to strive towards liberation.

It’s incredibly easy to be an anarchist if you just imagine the state’s coercive power never has or had any benefit, and was exclusively and intentionally maliciously created to hold power over others. While there may be a great deal of truth to that explanation, and that there

1 paper submitted, next one will be super easy. I hope grading goes ok, way over the word count and the format is all fucky, gah

I wanted to tweet last night about how fast an Advil I took worked but I was too tired lol

Somehow I’ve become sick :/ Family gathering this weekend or the 2 runs I went on somehow got me here. Feel like shit

holy fuck my anxiety is like out of control holy shit

"fuck fuck fuck fuck" "im sorry fuck im sorry" "oh god shit fuck" just cant stop lol its fucking awful

I feel really fucking overwhelmed right now - hard to focus on any one thing

hate my body :/

And I know it’s bullshit but it’s still hard

really frustrating problem of recreating uncomfortable social situations and then verbally expressing something. had this for a long long time just kinda really frustrating. and beating myself up for it after it happens just makes it worse im sure but :/

I think it’s really hard for me to imagine a future for myself without a lot of restraints. I really just want minimal constraints on myself, the “natural” constraints of things like having to eat and being stuck in this physical body are enough already

Work, exclusionary relationships, even clubs and stuff. Idk just that commitment ruins the spontaneous free association I want to be able to have. Coercive structures just ruin so much.

I feel like I have so much to say about this but nothings really coming out rn ig. I’m struggling for now

I jog like 100 yards every few days and now my metabolism is like 📈

I feel so restless, I can’t sleep and I don’t feel relaxed after work

boysmell uwu

I feel rly tired, classes are a lot rn :/

genshin boys hnnnggg

happier when i dont look in the mirror lol

problematic avoidance? yea sure feels enjoyable in the moment? yea sure :)

i really like my voice today 🥰

idk why just feelin it

i just felt heartache for the first time since gail and I broke up bc i was listening to "it never stops" by bad books

made me smile tho, felt nice in some way

oh also i wanted to mention this the other day but when I went out with brother and dad for birthday i saw this super cute guy omg lol i was blush so hard >///< for some reason its more exciting and intense, prob because I haven't been able to express it before now

I need to do more research on permaculture, rewilding, and light/heavy industry. They seem to be some of the areas where anarchism has its most powerful arguments against liberal/socdem solutions

Interact with people w/o being in monogamous partnership and just in general social since I feel like I’ve changed a lot of my perspectives (lol watch me just have worse anxiety). Maybe we’ll be spread across campus, but I imagine we’ll see each other somewhere which will be

Interesting. Wonder if we’ll make it to January or just run into each other and break the rules. If I call it I call it.

Ok fr done now, this was either super deep or I’m coping and can’t get over things or something else, either way was good to think

myself” (lol ew). And obv there’s no RA doctrine I must follow perfectly, I don’t have to perform anything to prove to myself, that would be self defeating. Just saying it’s tricky to navigate.

All this thinking about future stuff is just weird. Like it’s very dependent on what she wants and that’s hard to work around. And it’s totally possible/probable my mom has just baited to me think like this lol.