the cancelled ollie visit is still marked on my calendar and it makes me choke up every time i see it

bring back at work feels very strange and uneasy

do you think it’s bad to park your car on an incline every day

my eyes are looking a lot better, dots are smaller and much less red. hopeful that they will be cleared up after the next two sessions. eyelashes got a lil zapped but that’s the cost of doing business

i like playing atproto

oh huh i wonder if some of the unease is that i hadn't been supplementing experience with relatable autism, like i haven't listened to dotes in a bit

worried about what that means when i do properly finish their vids. its comforting for someone to express so frankly the things they feel

everyone is more articulate than me and i love them all

highkey pretty humiliating to have a digital record stretching back to versions of myself i don't really like

and that includes like, 6 hours ago at any given moment

kasey is so cool

proud to be the only joyfriend that made it

i can already tell this was a great fucking idea man

one of these days i’m gonna turn on sound in overwatch and ill win some games

shoulda washed my blanked today

i miss futur

i have no creative use for guilt

oops i talked to too many people and broke my brain again, i'm too attached to it

contributed too much, gotta grill

blegh i should shower to refresh my mind

hope julie is alright, we kinda go quiet when discourse pops up

today was kind of a more gummy, weighed down day. less springy. that being said tho its cool i kinda now have to tools and ability to realize (i.e. produce) things on a whim, even things i've wanted for some time

very grateful to jonas always

would like to return the favor someday, not sure what that would look like and im not gonna sweat it for now

getting on e has significantly changed how i think about politics

interestingly in the direction of classically conservative thought and further away from residual enlightenment rationalism

this is another way of saying i think i've been humbled a lot more at this point. it might be too much to say i have humility yet though

oops double linked the same thing bsky.app/profile/temu...

its a whole genre of post thats like "pbc did evil and my main takeaway is its awesome that theoretically someone could do something to avoid it"

dont wanna go fishing for examples but pbc employees do this too and its just kinda wacky

not really applicable to the immediate example, although part of what i was getting at anyway was not placing specific emphasis on agency (hence lazy 'evil' [which i suppose is actually counterintuitive]). ig it's more like "pbc can do no wrong and if it can then its ok bc le decentralize (gesture)"

ideal conditions has officially surpassed burger security, long gif, moderation discourse, and mary pds

ew i very much dislike ai pfps

hm i feel lightheaded, i should probably be eating something more substantial but i dont wanna

i didn't appreciate it very much at the time, but my course with emily fletcher was pretty great for exposing me to a lot of contemporary feminist philosophy that i regularly think about. it was far too analytical and anglophone-influenced but having the entry point was still really valuable

the syllabus doesn't speak my language by it engages my emotional faculties in the right way and is oriented around interesting concepts, even if it asks the wrong questions and gives worse answers

that really fucking pissed me off bsky.app/profile/did:... fuck you. bsky.app/profile/did:... bsky.app/profile/did:...

i might be more upset about the fact that it is an instantiation of such a revolting thought pattern than the personal slight itself

fucking malignant and pernicious to even have that disposition in you

maybe i shouldn't have given the /nbh disclaimer because it does have wider applicability but whatever

unfortunate, i gained a follower

i have to say i love the tension though

when a particular discourse is going on, i feel there's basically an obligation to not discuss other things to distract from the conversation

one reason is the obvious that these things run on steam and taking away from that is anti-solidaristic. another is that there is some communal knowledge to be gained by a group of people having the same conversation.

not like "one part of the community catches up to other people that possess the knowledge" (although in many cases thats what it will look like), you'll also see people trying things out and seeing how they land, reassessing and revisiting existing experiences with new context, laying battle lines,

idk its just a cool and rare social phenomenon, and bsky dev scene is still small enough that there is a community to speak of, not like things get subsumed in the sea of twitter.

i also like that, in part because it's smaller, the pace of things is slower. there's more time to meditate on the discussion and having that pervade the air one breathes is pretty beneficial for progress

god devs are such retards

downvote downvote downvote

you can just DO shit