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Pressures performance, more that it’s self policing) but yeah was really nice to transition from that mode with him. Still don’t fully understand how that transition happens, I think there’s a moment where enough chemistry happens in convo (not chemistry exclusive to “romantic”

relations to be clear) where genuine bits slip out and goes from there. Also moments with some effort as well, like just saying fuck it and sending something more out of comfort zone. Also helps when interlocutor is also perceived as being genuine and open as well, talking about

Also had really good and long convo with Ryno too :) I really like him

Also I’m making this my banner lmao it’s so good

It was really nice esp after that thread I made the other day talking about “authenticity”. Ryno is still p awk lol but I was able to express myself in a way I was comfortable with, without feeling like I was pressured into a performance (not that anyone ever really explicitly

Yesterday I tried to explain school abolition in DSA lol idk if I did a very good job. I get so nervous and flustered in groups too big, but there were only like 10 people. Really need to work on eye contact with people

Someone at my DSA meeting cited Lenin and kropotkin back to back

Are there allosexuals that chase asexuals? I can imagine but the motivation would have to be so interesting

“I get enough sex from the rest of my polycule, I just need someone to go to the farmers market with :3”

Someone that feels sexual attraction but doesn’t enjoy sex itself? Ig depends on how idiosyncratic you wanna be about defining things

Guy who just wants to test their self control

def hitting the depression and lethargy stage of not eating well, so annoying

forgot this weird feel where tummy is so empty you feel like youre gonna vomit. but also bazaar that i dont feel hungry at all lol, body has just given up on cues ig

Cat is the only person I see post good takes on insta, mostly organizing (thats real not performative) but also stuff like this

And yeah I mean it’s a bit hard to take seriously in insta format but fk it dude it’s getting there :)

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Related :(

fck

i found rlly cute femboy porn but was incognito and now i cant find him T-T (different from pic)

yay i found!! https://www.pornhub.com/model/kiwamine theyre enby, cute :3

super jealous of this skin and shaving, really clean, must take forever

I hate that nitzsche was right about defining words, it means I’ve gotta read all of history before speaking

quoted malatesta is my paper lmfao

Edited bits after, but this basically it

https://theanarchistlibrary.org/library/brian-a-dominick-animal-liberation-and-social-revolution#toc11 this is the best vegan text omg https://youtu.be/KViYiDn-p60

theanarchistlibrary.org

Animal Liberation and Social Revolution

Brian A. Dominick Animal Liberation and Social Revolution a vegan perspective on anarchism or an anarchist perspective on veganism, with a preface by Joseph...

https://t.co/PlN9BSu2Uo im brain blasting i hate these like 3 word terms with idiosyncratic meanings fuuuck T-T https://t.co/xbxgY5ebpB you fool, how could you have mistaken socially neccesary labor time for lower phase constant abstract labor value time

theacheron.medium.com

How “Socialist” Can Commodity Production Really Get?

Commodity Production has been a hot topic in Marxist debates in the last century. This article serves to clarify its meaning, role and…

Hmmm it is possible I have been misusing femme, and should instead be using fem

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But great willingness to speak are in attendance. Curiously I think this carries over to online as well, although online has extra dynamic where you can’t have small side convos/whispers. I’m sure there’s been plenty of anthro research on this stuff lol. 1on1s I talked about

Earlier today, 2+ others if strangers I’ll usually let others talk to each other first and wait for invitation? Unless someone else shy too or it feels like I’ll have to say first thing. Sometimes I’ll jump in if I feel very confident or if they’re totally missing the point

(Usually in schooling context). Big groups mostly always silent unless prompted, exceptions are weird idk. Also these are all modified if I know 1 person and I’ll just cling lmao

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Them (very rare person + dependent on my mood) then it’s one of fav configurations. 2 has some unique dynamics but is mostly similar to 3,4,5,6 in that often I can rely on others to carry if I’m not feeling and can jump in when feeling it. Smaller numbers most requires

More engagement, but if mutual engagement is there it’s more fulfilling and less pressure when speaking, but also less diversity of opinion. Usually though that’s a good thing, as long as it’s self curated people. Otherwise if you get stuck with someone without interesting

Things to say it’s brutal. I’m not exactly sure at what point it’s too many people, and probably there’s some variability, but I think it’s prob around when a facilitator is necessary/expedient. Too much pressure when speaking, enough people so that people with nothing to say

Also I’ve been thinking about how my social interaction comfortability varies on how many are there. Like one on one can be pretty weird for me, like there’s too much pressure on me to talk. But if I’m really engaging like philosophically w someone and I’m comfortable with

Feeling great physically after not overeating for a couple days. My hunger cues are all off prob eternally so previously I think I was eating an unhealthy amount until i was basically in pain and could really feel it, which is super shit lol. It’s just frustrating to have to

Keep an eye on things, because that lends me to unhealthy behavior as well.

I genuinely have over 150 tabs open of stuff I’m trying to read like fuuuck it’s so hard to get through, esp when one reading leads me to a bunch of others I’m passionate about. But I love following passion so I wouldn’t have it any other way, just wish I could be more organized

I wanna look into the political economy/philosophy of marginalism more deeply. Been taking another look at Marx and my head spinning a bit (in a good way)

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also bonus meme. yesterday at YDSA we spent a ton of time talking about what to do about AOC voting present on iron dome isreal stuff (like 450-9 vote btw lmao) and about how they're weak for not "forcing the vote". cringing super hard

like i mean i dont have a super strong opinion on a theory of political party strategy and stuff esp considering im influenced by anarchist strategy, but it just all seems so foolish and performative and useless :/. strongly considering not going to general meetings,

i dont feel like i get anything out of them and if theres an organized event i want to attend itll be posted in discord probably. idk yet tho and theyre pretty far between so maybe ok

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alternative. that being said, i havent fully grappled with the difference between individual commodities and private property like land, which the latter is clearly illegitimate. I've been thinking about production for exchange and the primitive accumulation of resources

for the commodities, as well as things like intellectual property that are also clearly illegitimate. So I'm fairly confident in my stance, but I would still like to read more about it specifically.

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i had this convo with my parents like 2 days ago, where i absolutely bit the bullet. stealing is legitimate regardless of the size of the firm, stop appealing to shit like "they can handle the loss" very silly, as destiny rightfully calls out. the waffling around is really weird

ofc that doesnt speak to it as a strategy, there are plenty of things that are philosophically justifiable that are nonetheless nonadvisable. its really awkward to see opinions expressed like this, and unfortunatley it makes progressive dems look like there really is no

https://youtu.be/wO7fJpwTzTI this is a really good example of how progressive people / demsocs are really weird and misinformed. they dont really understand like the processes of capital, and therefore like gesture at "lefty opinions" but dont have a coherent philosophy to back it up

youtu.be

"He's DUMB, MAD And OBSESSED With Me!" - ActualJake Responds To Destiny's Tweet

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Also interesting bc my personality will interact with other cis women in different ways. For instance there’s another cis woman in my class that’s in my opinion much more philosophically capable than others, so I’m much more willing to be critical and actually engage with her

Opinions/takes to the extent that upon reflection I worry she might think I’m being too harsh lol rip. But with most other ppl (basically all genders) I’ll just assume basic bitch zzz agreeable personality affirming everything

Idk if I have overall solution or final thoughts just some frustrations I’m feeling. One last note is that Maya has gender expression that I’m like fuuuuck sometimes I wish I look way more like (small figure, short, nice brown hair, piercings, clothes) which complicates yknow

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Much more comfortable role I can slip into given my socialization. But with cis women it’s sorta weird I feel for me. Like if I was more femme presenting I feel like I could get away with my less curated personality with compliments and such, but I worry about making ppl feel

Uncomfy. Like I’m not even really interested in pursuing a relationship (platonic or “romantic”) with Maya for instance, it just bothers me that I don’t feel able to express myself.