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willow
Chaotic Boy @maniacmongoose "A withered past, and a blurry future" you can't make fun of me, i was like 15 https://www.tumblr.com/maniacmongoose
willowFeb 2, 2025
https://kolektiva.social/@Kyler Kyler @Kyler@kolektiva.social Not being or becoming, but embodying the remainder. This a a paraphrase of a quote from Lee Edelman's No Future (pg 24-25): Thus, queerness could never constitute an authentic or substantive identity, but only a structural position determined by the imperative of figuration; for the gap, the non coincidence, that the order of the signifier installs both informs and inhabits queerness as it inhabits reproductive futurism. But it does so with a difference. Where futurism always anticipates, in the image of an Imaginary past, a realization of meaning that will suture identity by closing that gap, queerness undoes the identities through which we experience ourselves as subjects, insisting on the Real of a jouissance that social reality and the futurism on which it relies have already foreclosed. Queerness, therefore, is never a matter of being or becoming but, rather, of embodying the remainder of the Real internal to the Symbolic order. One name for this unnameable remainder, as Lacan describes it, is jouissance, sometimes translated as “enjoyment”: a movement beyond the pleasure principle, beyond the distinctions of pleasure and pain, a violent passage beyond the bounds of identity, meaning, and law. the only hint i have for the hands banner is that the original unedited image, which is just a normal black and white manga panel, is titled 23523. i have another edited version up on https://anilist.co/user/DrearyWillow pfp is Tōka Takanashi from Love, Chunibyo & Other delusions with sparkles and a collar n shit
this is a killer layout tho i should bring this back
willow
@WoojungSon-c6n 1 hour ago Thanks, just noticed most of Raymond Geuss videos I watch on YouTube were uploaded by you These videos helped a lot https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UP2LRqVHx94&lc=UgyA7GCLfK2GldB8wF54AaABAg
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willow
alt text backfill (+ i forgot i had previously posted about this)
text of post is from moishe postone, time, labor, and social domination, pg 49.
Antonin Artaud, 1947. Photograph by Georges Pastier Used in Who Needs a Worldview, 146, Raymond Geuss, Metaphysics Without Roots https://x.com/nicoscosc/status/1836809845745537393 Yoon Kim @nicoscosc Antonin Artaud: “Any true feeling cannot in reality be expressed. To do so is to betray it. To express it, however, is to *conceal* it. True expression conceals what it exhibits. … Any strong feeling produces an idea of emptiness within us, and lucid language which prevents [+] this emptiness also prevents poetry appearing in thought. For this reason an image, an allegory, a form disguising what it means to reveal, has more meaning to the mind than the enlightenment brought about by words or their analysis. [+] Hence true beauty never strikes us directly and the setting sun is beautiful because of everything else we lose by it.” (The Theatre and Its Double, tr. Victor Corti) alison dj 7:' ') ) @alisondj_dj •17h I always think this about the modernist project against the postmodernists People assume postmodernism was a pushback against modern 'sincerity', but we never truly expressed anything The chaos of postmodernism I think is a closer expression of our humanity, no 'concealing'
willowFeb 8, 2025
willow 2/4/25 18:24 most people's politics are just shadowboxing against the concept of mediation willow 9/20/24 9:53 mooooom the postmodernists are doing humanism and authenticity alison dj 7:' ') ) @alisondj_dj •17h I always think this about the modernist project against the postmodernists People assume postmodernism was a pushback against modern 'sincerity', but we never truly expressed anything The chaos of postmodernism I think is a closer expression of our humanity, no 'concealing'
willow
my ED was pretty formative to my identification with femininity
maniacmongoose reblogged cuddlesandbones I want… I want my collarbones to show. I want to feel dainty in sundresses. I want to be afraid of how I walk because my thighs won’t touch and it would feel strange. I want people to offer to give me piggy backs. I want my girlfriend to be able to lift me up. I want my girlfriend to beg for me to stay in her lap because I’m light. I want to cross my legs in class without struggling under the desk. I want to feel my cheekbones and jawline when I wash my face. I want my friends to be afraid of roughly grabbing me because they would think I’m fragile. I want people to ask me to be their date at prom, not to be the one that begs several classmates. I want to borrow colleague’s hoodies/jackets and be large on me. I want my hands to feel dainty while holding my gf’s hand/cupping her cheek/doing literally everthing. I want one sandwich to be so filling because my stomach is too small. I want people to offer to carry my things because they think they would be too heavy for me. I want to finally be able to wear a swimsuit in the summer camps without feeling ashamed of my thighs and belly. I want to easily walk through desks without struggling to fit between them. I want my thighs to still look small even when sitting on the chair. I want to jump and run across the hallways without looking disgusting. I want to be able to easily do exercises in P.E. I want to wear skirts at school without sucking in my belly. I want to be feminine at least from now on. I want to be able to wear every colour of jeans because I would still look small. I want to go shopping and fit the smallest sizes.
willow
@getdownon.it invalid :c
Identity Decentralisation Labeler Invalid Handle https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:mxsvcwyq6mofumlwyxiws3g5
willow
https://soundcloud.com/loser64/i-cant-get-what-i-want-ft-ntpa I can't get what I want [ft. NTPA] - Loser64 Not the Proper Attire [Loser64:] Am I creepy? Is there something that I’m not seeing ‘cause everyone acts like it’s easy I just wish you were happy to see me Can you see me? Let me just say I don’t need all that much to be okay And I’m hoping it works out one day But I know that it’s not going my way Going my way cause I- I can't get what I want I’m worn out and my mind is shot I’ll give up, I’ll give in try again and again I’m just sick of it all and I wish it would end and I- I can’t get what I need ‘Cause you’re so damn hard to please I would pour out my heart But you won’t play your part I’m just holding my breath for a movie that’s not gonna start [NTPA:] Am I wrong Or do you simply refuse to play along I’ve done all I can I’ve followed the plan But I keep messing up again and again Do you care Or do you believe I was just a waste of your air Thought I did what you want Thought we had lots of fun But I guess all of that is done and I- [Loser64] I can't get what I want I’m worn out and my mind is shot I’ll give up, I’ll give in try again and again I’m just sick of it all and I wish it would end and I- I can’t get what I need ‘Cause you’re so damn hard to please I would pour out my heart But you won’t play your part I’m just holding my breath for a movie that’s not gonna start You’ve got it better than I’ll ever have I don’t expect you to understand There’s nothing left and it makes me sad I always feel like such a And it just kills me Every time I look at you I know it's stupid I know there’s nothing I can do
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willow
when i’m in a resolving identity competition and my opponent is an atproto dev
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willow
the maniac cover is prolly my fav tho soundcloud.com/maniacxxmusi...
brainsoup in my soundcloud likes
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willow
but i don't want to just be happy for you, i want to be happy with you
willow
brakence - deepfake And you're two thousand miles away So why am I stalking your Twitter and lying awake? I show my true colors, you left and my life got so gray I can't get over you, yet I built up so much hate But despite all the lies and projections, I hope you're okay
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willow
yes it’s just how it appears in the client
miq aspect ratio 3x2
slug aspect ratio 1200x630
willow
Karl Marx, Draft of an Article on Friendrich List's Book It is one of the greatest misapprehensions to speak of free, human, social labour, of labour without private property. “Labour” by its very nature is unfree, unhuman, unsocial activity, determined by private property and creating private property. Hence the abolition of private property will become a reality only when it is conceived as the abolition of “labour” https://marxists.architexturez.net/archive/marx/works/1845/03/list.htm Marx and Engels Collected Works (MECW) Volume 4 https://marxists.architexturez.net/archive/marx/works/cw/volume04/index.htm
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willow
an orphaned willow reply to a deleted post? you’ll never guess who
ID did:plc:b3pn34agqqchkaf75v7h43dk Identities at://juli.ee Services #atproto_pds https://pds.bsky.mom https://pdsls.dev/at/did:plc:b3pn34agqqchkaf75v7h43dk/app.bsky.feed.post/3kyre2mvdrs2y
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willow
https://pdsls.dev/at/did:plc:hx53snho72xoj7zqt5uice4u/app.bsky.feed.post/3li46xs6ai32k "text": "yea that works", "alt-for-nan": "but it's annoying as fuck", "$type": "app.bsky.feed.post",
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willow
Leaving Bluesky This link is taking you to the following website: Visit Site / Cancel The embed on the root post is different from the facet link
willow
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willow
this is how you look rn
momlife comics “One Of The [Many] Differences Between Me & My Husband”, also know as Peach Husband Oh look, the last ripe peach! I’ll use it as a special treat in my daily smoothie.
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@dreary.bsky.social
18 x 92 =1,656
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willow
youtu.be/26PRhCJtgPQ
willow / @dreary.dev 666 followers slipknot - the heretic anthem
willow
i was too much of a coward to keep this up the other day
willow @dreary.dev • 14m feeling a lot of things i haven't felt since gail willow@dreary.dev • 13m between [redacted] and [redacted],., it's been really nice honestly willow@dreary.dev • 10m i have such a wider breadth of emotion now than then, and so to be clear, this of course is not my only touchstone for love, but nonetheless the recurrence in modified fashion is pleasant
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willow
i just don’t do drugs or get in legal trouble
https://ricepuritytest.com/ The Official Rice Purity Test Have you ever... Your score: 29

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willow
this happened to me yesterday and then went away after a bit, idk
willow
mom (ren) 12/16/21 11:30 AM I HOPE U ARE HAVING A WONDERFUL DAY !!! take it easy i love u!! fruits basket tohru honda
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willow
ren was a rly good friend (2021 btw)
ren 🍓 — 12/15/21, 8:46 PM tucks u in jumps for joy bc we can still chat willow — 12/15/21, 8:52 PM Ren I’m waiting for my bedtime story ren 🍓 — 12/15/21, 8:56 PM once upon a time there was a wonderful human being named kyler. she was absolutely fantastic and any sane person would simply die for him on the spot. one day a little gremlin named ren came across the national treasure they call kyler, and she lost his fucking marbles bc they were like the best person ever and uhhhhhhhh ren exploded and then stitched themself back together and trembled violently and kyler was like wtf is wrong with u but ren simply took a deep breath, started crying, took another deep breath, and then in verbose detail explained to kyler that she would commit any crime to see him happy and is so happy that she is her friend, THE END willow — 12/15/21, 8:57 PM You are my favorite ren 🍓 — 12/15/21, 8:57 PM explodes into itty bitty bits and dies willow — 12/15/21, 8:58 PM Puts you back together ren 🍓 — 12/15/21, 8:59 PM if u told me to kms by jumping off a building i would do so many flips in ur honor
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willow
ren 🍓 — 12/15/21, 9:22 PM character quirk willow — 12/15/21, 9:22 PM Omg I’m tired I thought u said cracker quirk This discourse will be the end of me ren 🍓 — 12/15/21, 9:22 PM NOOOOOOO my cracker quirk is saying the n word with a violent redneck accent 🥺🥺 whats urs? 🥰
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willow
fascinating willow, tell me more
ren 🍓 — 11/18/21, 8:18 PM if i could detach my tits like legos i’d be fucking unstoppable willow — 11/18/21, 8:20 PM 🔥 ren 🍓 — 11/18/21, 8:20 PM URINARY TRAUMA AND TESTICULAR COMPLAINTS the two genders willow — 11/18/21, 8:20 PM LMFAO thats the other thing too i actually id think like going on hrt but i really do not want boob
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willow
one more for the history books
willow — 12/30/21, 12:02 PM new pfps :3 Mellow and mom (ren) talking with devilman
willow
never forget, i used to be dogshit at overwatch
season 4 overwatch 1019 final SR, 1173 season high SR most played heroes: zen, junkrat, soldier: 76 for 5 hours each image found in ren discord dms on 11/14/21, 8:30 PM
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willow
i did get a little better tho
Rank 109 Top 500 4400 SR /mnt/Vault/Pictures/documents/4-4-21 Backup/Overwatch/2019-10-19 12.10.41.jpg
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willow
sillytroll / prxr - nov 25 2024 bus……my such big bus …… nooooo crying pepe monkey thing drowning looking at phone
willowNov 27, 2024
bus......my such big bus ......
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willow
alt text backfill (re: boredom)
nietzsche, the gay science, section 329, book four: st januarius Leisure and idleness. - There is something of the American Indian, something of the savagery peculiar to the Indian blood, in the way the Americans strive for gold; and their breathless haste in working - the true vice of the new world - is already starting to spread to old Europe, making it savage and covering it with a most odd mindlessness. Already one is ashamed of keeping still; long reflection almost gives people a bad conscience. One thinks with a watch in hand, as one eats lunch with an eye on the financial pages - one lives like someone who might always 'miss out on something' . 'Rather do anything than nothing' - even this principle is a cord to strangle all culture and all higher taste. Just as all forms are visibly being destroyed by the haste of the workers, so, too, is the feeling for form itself, the ear and eye for the melody of movements. The proof of this lies in the crude obviousness which is universally demanded in all situations in which people want for once to be honest with others - in their relations with friends, women, relatives, children, teachers, students, leaders, and princes: one no longer has time and energy for ceremony, for civility with detours, for esprit in conversation, and in general for any otium.
For life in a hunt for profit constantly forces people to expend their spirit to the point of exhaustion in continual pretence or out-smarting or forestalling others: the true virtue today is doing something in less time than someone else. And thus hours in which honesty is allowed are rare; during them, however, one is tired and wants not only to 'let oneself go' but also to lay oneself down and stretch oneself out unceremoniously to one's full length and breadth. This is the way people now write letters, the style and spirit of which will always be the true 'sign of the times'. If sociability and the arts still offer any delight, it is the kind of delight that overworked slaves make for themselves. How frugal our educated and uneducated have become concerning 'joy'! How they are becoming increasingly suspicious of all joy! More and more, work gets all good conscience on its side; the desire for joy already calls itself a 'need to recuperate' and is starting to be ashamed of itself 'One owes it to one's health' - that is what one says when caught on an excursion in the countryside. Soon we may well reach the point where one can't give in to the desire for a vita contemplativa21 (that is, taking a walk with ideas and friends) without self-contempt and a bad conscience. Well, formerly it was the other way around: work was afflicted with a bad conscience. A person of good family concealed the fact that he worked if need compelled him to work. The slave worked under the pressure of the feeling that he was doing something contemptible: 'doing' was itself contemptible. 'Nobility and honour are attached solely to otium and bellum' - that was the ancient prejudice!
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willow
you all horrify me
my ios home screen with only apps on the home bar media folder, work folder, brave browser, utilities folder. everything else tucked away on the app library tab. each folder only has 9 apps each :)
willow
lol
https://www.idrlabs.com/trauma-profile/test.php Chilhood Injustice 15% Childhood Abandonment 5% Childhood Betrayal 20% Chilhood Rejection 25% Adult Shame 6% Adult Frustration 12% Adult Inattention 18% Adult Stress 81% Adult Anxiety 25%

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willow
https://thatsamestreet.bandcamp.com/album/demo-2 that same street - demo [2020]
willow
thanks for being boring with me <33
#diary willow 6/21/24 7:19 PM being bored and wasting time is such a valuable virtue and no one is permitted its luxury any longer
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willow
this says a lot about society
kasey @kasey.cafe • 2h • fae/faer • it/its she/her the atproto python sdk is pretty good kasey @kasey.cafe • 14d • fae/faer • it/its • she/her the python atproto sdk like really sucks
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willow
you guys are using discover? with the 'you guys are getting paid for this' meme
willow
willow 2/4/25 18:24 most people's politics are just shadowboxing against the concept of mediation willow 9/20/24 9:53 mooooom the postmodernists are doing humanism and authenticity alison dj 7:' ') ) @alisondj_dj •17h I always think this about the modernist project against the postmodernists People assume postmodernism was a pushback against modern 'sincerity', but we never truly expressed anything The chaos of postmodernism I think is a closer expression of our humanity, no 'concealing'
@dreary.bsky.social
update: i have 6 kittens now
artie
willowJan 22, 2024
i’m generally not much of a pet lover but i’ve recently grown accustomed to them - now sleeping without my 3 kittens just feels wrong
willow
okay but imagine: !show where only allowlisted labeled accounts are displayed
https://bsky.app/profile/decentralise.goeo.lol Non-default PLC keys This user has set a non-default PLC rotation key, possibly through a self hosted PDS. did:web This user is a did:web identity, tied to a domain name, and centralised on ICANN's authority. off show badge hide
willow
willowFeb 7, 2025
eager and filled with desire
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@dreary.bsky.social
oh yea in case it wasn’t clear i don’t use a local tts thing unfortunately
Optional - Balabolka TTS Download Balabolka as an alternative to gTTS This is my preferred free Text-to-Speech method. gTTS gets rate limited very quickly. If you are not on Windows, Balabolka runs through Wine. You can configure a Wine prefix if desired. Ctrl+K for Skin options. "FM" is my preference. Ctrl+Shift+D for Use Online TTS Service. "Google [1] - English (US)" is my preference. https://github.com/DrearyWillow/pdfp?tab=readme-ov-file#optional---balabolka-tts
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willow
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willow
also i’m sorry but fuck you prxr, this isn’t exactly voluntary.
this is partially a skill issue that i'm just hopelessly incompetent :(:):(:):(:): @sillytroll.bsky.social not a skill issue why put yourself into a place you don't like and keep doubt/critical yourself find a place where truly appreciate your talent and that's all this opinion is all thing I try to express in the past all the time... February 5, 2025 at 2:45 PM :(:):(:):(:):@sillytroll.bsky.social•17m Isn't it stupid to have to cater to/ compare others' strengths with your own weaknesses
willow
Yuko Don't you like me? Don't you like a young, pale, girl who does nothing but study and think? https://vndb.org/v739 禁断の血族 Kindan no Ketsuzoku Fatal Relations
willow
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:hx53snho72xoj7zqt5uice4u/post/3kpirvfsvox2w #diary willow — 4/6/24, 7:01 PM https://bsky.app/profile/dreary.bsky.social/post/3kpirvfsvox2w Bluesky Social willow (@dreary.bsky.social) idk its not even like sadness per se, it's more like lack of purpose. i have all sorts of drives but lack the temporal and psychological resources to cultivate them properly into powers and creations in the way i'd like - and as a result i become demotivated from pursuing them. [contains quote post or other embedded content] quote is: https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:hx53snho72xoj7zqt5uice4u/post/3kpioo3rnug2b i'm not happy and i won't ever be i was about to say just now "oh im feeling better" and say some cleve things about taxonomizing and analyzing unhappiness is the thing that makes me happy, as im a philosopher but no you just talked to jules dummy thread continued: in which case maybe the solution is, suck it up, get good, try anyway. which yea fair enough - i'm overstating the issue and i'm trapping myself to an extent. the other solution is to say that the diagnosis is incorrect - i don't need purpose, i need momentum, i need distraction. spend time with your gf you fucking dummy, that makes you happy, that gives you some semblance of meaning.
willow
in honor of dan's quitting i'd like to remind everyone that he put this image in a real PR github.com/bluesky-soci...
https://bsky.app/profile/did:plc:hx53snho72xoj7zqt5uice4u/post/3kyrbzdu43t2u willow @dreary.bsky.social what is going on here [Adult Content] prxr @prxr.bsky.social ohhh you have a type! willow ~ have you tried not watching porn on YouTube? willow ~ youtube what r u doing to willow? YouTube: ohhh hi we know willow is so lazy and shy so ......... we r just try to give some help .......... :pleading:
willow
https://nhentai.net/g/448785/ Kuro Gal Kanojo ga Dekita Riyuu | The Reason Why I Was Able to Get a Black Gyaru Girlfriend page 28 Originally found this from this vid of nomu - butterfly https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5G1GqK3Rcog this is an awesome channel btw
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willow
https://nhentai.net/g/448785/ Kuro Gal Kanojo ga Dekita Riyuu | The Reason Why I Was Able to Get a Black Gyaru Girlfriend page 15
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willow
imagine if i had balls
willow 10/9/2024 12:26 PM alice roberts critical bug in EditProfileDialog.tsx, samuel pls fix i used to believe @haileyok.com was a good developer, but to let such an egregious error through code review...
alice robertsOct 19, 2024
critical bug in EditProfileDialog.tsx, samuel pls fix
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