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I’m so tired already :( this is going to be a rough semester
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Forgot how bad I am at human interaction lol yikes
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i like the word eclectic, seems p neat
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My prof is really young and nice, but class is full of econ poli Sci bros so I’m scared lol
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My neck is a mangled mess (steroid inj) but overall feeling good of doing irl things
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Pretty sure I became 15% more gay this morning
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honestly first class wasnt nearly as bad as i hyped in my head, mostly just boring. i dont get how people just decide to do small talk tho how bazaar
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extremely interesting, still skeptical about the state and how the author defines "socialism", but yeah theory struggles with the empirical reality - also i recognize like all the references thats so cool https://journals.sagepub.com/doi/pdf/10.1177/08969205211031624
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Filled out a survey for a class tomorrow and wow I am like really really uncomfortable providing personal information like pronouns/anxiety/accommodations like it feels so fake I’d rather just deal with it on my own and not bother risking uncomfy
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Mom yesterday talking to store worker: “yeah it’s a run for women - or, I mean, people that identify as women” 🙃
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chubby ugly disgusting fucking body :(
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euphoria https://picrew.me/image_maker/407340

picrew.me

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successfully finished hatewatching 13 reasons why
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reading from democracy to freedom, very interesting but I still worry about consistency. like institutionalizing charity as welfare is far more effective, and even with a gift economy scare resources still need to be allocated. I worry that free association will not be able to
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https://c4ss.org/content/52430

c4ss.org

Rights, Privilege, and Power

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Ok trial 2. Basically I think I’m overall glad I’ve not felt the need to think about her as much. Before when imagining meeting up it felt like I could be going back to something safe and familiar, like it would remove the tension and pain of absence I was feeling.
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Alright I’m gonna try to write my thoughts out. So she’s been on my mind more often recently, and I think that’s best explained by an initial thought and then bc it’s recent brain can associate fresh things with. But still I think sorting through feelings on will be important
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This is so cool (didn’t wanna qt bc small acc lol) I really gotta write out my thoughts soon, bc clearly this is something I was wanting to share w Gail
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went down a gintis pipeline and found this interview, really interesting progression and perspective. I think I still disagree about what he calls postmodernism (rick wolff postmodern??) and that its harmful and useless, https://t.co/8kDeaek5d1
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Towards a Political Economy of Education: A Radical Critique of Ivan Illich 's Deschooling Society by Herbert Gintis - very good at describing my frustrations with Illich
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Aaah I had a long dream about gail (not romantic/sexual just hanging out) and when I was coming out of it I reached across my bed to try to hold her/cuddle. Lol kinda embarrassing kinda cute that brain went there
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Had a weird moment where I thought about talking to/ meeting up with Gail again and felt like nervous and apprehensive, where most of the time I have felt like really looking forward to and then a subsequent guilt kinda thing about that feeling. Idk how to make sense of either rn
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Almost done with vol 1 of capital, have really enjoyed the lecture series alongside makes things way easier to understand, and I like the slow and deep pace. Shame I don’t think I’ll be able to get through vol 2 before school starts
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Just got back to back ads for vegan foundation and men anti-balding product and I love how different that is
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In Capital Vol 1, Marx argued that productivity increases tend to lead to a reduction in demand for labor, although Marx celebrated the productivity of mechanization, condemning capitalist relations of production rather than technology itself.
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i hate myself so much im so fat and gross
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https://www.marxists.org/archive/marx/works/1843/letters/43_09.htm
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"As shown above (see section 4.2 or 5.2), economic actors follow a rationality that is imposed upon them by the economic relations. Thus the constant attempts by capitalists to raise the level of valorization (in the normal case) does not result from an “excessive addiction to
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Reading “Racism Without Racists” right now and oh god the amount of bullshit Gail had to deal with from me… yikes. I was afforded a lot of patience and grace but like wow that must have been so frustrating. Like ofc I’ve known this for a bit but just remembering
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Sociology is super interesting but I’m kinda glad the classes offered at UW kinda suck, otherwise I’d be very tempted to ruin my course plan even more lol
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oh my god this is the shit i hate so much like https://youtu.be/D9yWdfszKFs

youtu.be

A Practical Guide to Leftist YouTube

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This response feels really weird and gross idk https://youtu.be/tR28fJBFWjs
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Dude today has been like low key traumatic. It’s been move in week for ppl so they set up a big dumpster outside for trash and it has a bunch of flies, and somehow they’re getting in my apartment. It freaks me out so much having them around, and killing them is dubious ethical
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https://libcom.org/library/review-debt-first-5000-years-david-graeber

libcom.org

Review of Debt: The First 5,000 Years by David Graeber

Wayne Price reviews David Graeber's book on the history of debt.

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Philosophy of relationships has always been incredibly important to me and my understanding of how I connect with others. Drifting between various understandings during adolescence drastically altered how I interacted with others. Often this wasn't exactly conscious choice by me
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Getting cosmetic surgery for my neck tomorrow. I really hope it helps. I honestly don’t mind too much intrinsically, but others treat me a little weird for it I think. It was fading for a bit but more recently it’s become larger and more red. It would be nice to have it
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https://theanarchistlibrary.org/library/i-an-ok-taking-children-seriously-tcs-and-anarchy

theanarchistlibrary.org

Taking Children Seriously (TCS) and Anarchy

(I)An-ok Taking Children Seriously (TCS) and Anarchy Fall 2002 from Green Anarchy #10, Fall 2002

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Why Tolstoy so based on war and prisons but so cringe on marriage (also prison)
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Marriage is between one enby, one trans woman, and one gender fluid person. Anything else is an abomination. -god probably
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Were a man but to act as he finds best for himself, were he but to refuse to go to war, he would have to dig ditches; but he would not be tortured in Sebastopool or Plevna. Let a man not believe that it is indispensable to wear a watch chain and to have useless drawing rooms,
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inside you there are two wolves
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incredible
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My haircut made it so I lost the breakpoint of having the top easily and comfortably going behind my ears on its own T^T rough to adapt to now
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Oh my god they’re so hot lol. I’m so out of practice being flirty fuck lmao, this is nice tho :)
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It might be argued that the existing, hierarchical state, if and when it has been seized by a ‘true’ socialist party and has successfully transitioned from capitalism to an early stage of socialism, will lose its capitalist character. Even if such a state retains some
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"helping others process emotional stress" - an patriarchal expectation I don't think I've examined thoroughly enough in my own actions and behavior. I think in large part I took advantage of this expectation in my relationship with Gail and didn't give her the space, room, and
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i am immensely interested in informal social structures of power
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The society of the future should be nothing other than the universalization of the organisation with which the international will have endowed itself. We must, therefore, have to care to ensure that that organisation comes as close as we may to our ideal.
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