Feeling great physically after not overeating for a couple days. My hunger cues are all off prob eternally so previously I think I was eating an unhealthy amount until i was basically in pain and could really feel it, which is super shit lol. It’s just frustrating to have to

I genuinely have over 150 tabs open of stuff I’m trying to read like fuuuck it’s so hard to get through, esp when one reading leads me to a bunch of others I’m passionate about. But I love following passion so I wouldn’t have it any other way, just wish I could be more organized

I wanna look into the political economy/philosophy of marginalism more deeply. Been taking another look at Marx and my head spinning a bit (in a good way)

https://youtu.be/wO7fJpwTzTI this is a really good example of how progressive people / demsocs are really weird and misinformed. they dont really understand like the processes of capital, and therefore like gesture at "lefty opinions" but dont have a coherent philosophy to back it up

Lol fk there’s this girl named Maya in my class and she’s super cute and we got paired to talk and I was really nerv >.< I feel like social stuff is really hard bc my personality has developed into kinda flirty sounding default? Like I’ll constantly compliment friends and call

Also seeing this stuff has been really hard

really wild how much not eating much for a day can really change, feel really good about body rn, ive sorta been maintaining for a bit but i think i want to drop just a touch, i know prob unhealthy but ill stay within good range (i know that ill say that now and might feel diff

Wanted to talk to Bookchin person but got shy again rip

Liz Kleinrock's Start Here Start Now: A Guide to Antibias and Antiracist Work in Your School Community is probably the best work I've read on social justice pedagogy. I only have access to the intro and first chapter but already far far better than books like Racism without

oh my god im crying

I’m so fucking tired but I can’t fucking sleep. And I’m doing this thing where I ruminate over every social interaction ever and beat myself up over it and it sucks :( hurty

Stephen J Ball, The teacher’s soul and the terrors of performativity. seriously good piece. i could read it a bunch of times and i hope i will again soon. talks about how people and institutions change as a result of advanced liberal reforms. super interesting and basically

actually i realize ive had chest stuff going on for a while, contrary to what i said the other day. i dont know if its really dysphoria, because that feels like a bit term and its not like that bad, but i mean there definitely has been a shift in my understanding and relationship

i hate my body in theory but then i look in the mirror and feel ok (only when wearing lots of clothes actually seeing skin is sad). This demonstrates that marx was mistaken and idealism was correct all along. in this essay i will

made this for muz lol

lol im so tired and i hate my body :/ having a rough go rn. dont feel like i can relax. also funny news i got 10/10 on my garbage presentation lmao in case we needed any more proof that grades are useless

wanna die :/

i just had the most bazaar interaction?? i was walking my dad out after he helped me in my apartment and this guy and 2 girls leave the elevator. were ahead so i open the door for my dad and everyone else. my dad and the girls walk through but the guy stops while walking and

What an odd time to look in the mirror and feel really good about myself

Lol I just spent an hour sweating dreading my presentation god fuck hell Seriously my heart was beating so fast fuck , didn’t help that I realized the whole thesis of my presentation was way more unclear than I thought right before class so I spent all this time panic editing

I have a lot of thoughts and feelings I'd like to process and write down so I think I might just do that for a bit - probably just gonna make one giga vent thread

I am once again begging for progressives to stop appealing to “normality”

reading "prison by any other name" bc the abolitionist dsa reading group is doing it and its literally just a worse discipline and punish. i mean i guess its phrased easier and has more up to date data and language but meh zz the way they make the args annoy me

I’m gonna end it all if I hear another college humanities liberal idpol wokeoid invokes ethical relativism to disprove Kant

I think I have found someone I actually admire in history, whereas before I never could. Harry Kelly, anarchist, Modern Schooler, seems like he was pretty decent guy actually. Avrich didn't hesitate to bring up the faults of other people within the Ferrer movement, but Kelly

It’s pretty incredible how fast my anxiety can go from 0 to like really high - extra school project, landlord stuff, social interaction stuff - it’s all like stuff I have minimal control over and I can’t really plan around, really stressful to me

The steroid shots in my neck have worked really well - much much flatter and color is much much more faint

shooting my shot im so nervous 😬😬😬 i dont wanna say the wrong thing or be weird ah

this is such a great succinct explanation of what truly liberatory education is about

Reading "The Modern School Movement" by Avrich and there are a few things that stick out to me as lessons from past attempts at liberatory pedagogy. 1. Money - often reliant on donations to stay afloat, which makes sense, ideally would be offered freely. Great challenge to

i wanna study international relations and see how and why its different from US federalism vs rojava style federalism

yo just reflecting on communist manifesto and ethics of care. one objection to EoC is that it just reinforces and valorizes oppressed values rather than subverting them. But i think a good counter example is how efforts to squeeze more profit out of the working class involved

mom pushing me to do exercise n stuff is very funny (i want to do more exercise its just funny how unaware she is of weight/ana considerations, which is part of my problematic motivation :P)

im becoming more and more pleased with my hair :) feel v pretty

God I love these two, always have great takes. These threads really good, and ofc personally applicable.

I think my high school psych class was a massive turning point/ start for my political and philosophical perspectives. Very much informs my epistemic humility and first thing i experienced that was like "oh professional ppl in these fields thought this wacky stuff not long ago"

also recent discourse around school and bedtime abolition is fun because i had the unreasonable(ly based) positions before it started, feels great. also arguments over definitions/misunderstandings of words are primary and people dont really wanna look into stuff or be charitable

this day has felt so long, but in a good way. i finished 3 books. skipping lecture is so pog, and even going out wasnt totally a negative experience. being able to walk to shit feels really nice too

my YDSA meeting was so white lol. presenter guy was interesting about history of marxism, but discussion afterwards i could have had with libs lol. what an odd group, but i enjoy it i think. dont think im gonna find many other anarkiddies but what can ya do

Ok I reread Illich and I think I like him better now, definitely quirky but he has some good ideas. Gonna reread Gintis critique now tho

Lol fight back by being exploited locally with poor worker rights/pay. Exploit your own workers. Run your own life. Your carbon footprint is nothing compared to the corporations that run you, so instead of challenging this authority attempt to become it yourself.

https://www.tandfonline.com/doi/full/10.1080/17508487.2016.1154583 some things i find really interesting, a few points where its like yikes idk (caring teachers, little bit of ageist assumptions, discipline etc)

oh my god how i have not heard of this actor before hes so hot lmao (Timothée Chalamet for future research) also yeah im aware i might be a sexual narcissist so what

really good article: Teachers as mothers in the elementary classroom: negotiating the needs of self and other James, Jennifer Hauver https://booksc.org/book/30306765/264409

My prof keeps saying “He she or they” when referring to a nonspecific individual, just say they

Assignment in class to propose an ed policy: someone says “increase autonomy… of teachers grading students” lmfao incredible

also interesting how socdems and other progressive ppl are so against school abolition, while that and RA was the things that got me much more into anarchism, makes sense tho they struggle for better access for disadvantaged ppl

i love learning but i hate school - reading this book for class describing a classroom experience and holy fuck the secondhand embarrassment and anxiety ive had to stop 3 times now what a horrendous environment