i think a lot of my problems last year were in part attributable to my inability to muster criticisms of wittgenstein

the people on denpa-chan and the next generation of youtube posters leave me rather unimpressed and uninterested

my experiences with phoebe are unbelievably corporeal, i'm constantly shocked how strong my body reacts all over

it's not even a metaphor when i say that my skin feels electric or my eyes are full of brightness or my heart skips a beat, i react so strongly when im with her

and yet i'm not like completely swept off my feet or overly romantic about it all, i don't feel pressure and i don't feel exuberance

sometimes she'll just say something and i'll start leaking or my breath will be completely stolen or i'll squirm around in excitement

it's also great that all of this is interspersed with casual conversation, i have fun with her but i appreciate thats not all it is

honestly i think this is just the result of having a sexually interested relationship alongside enough comfortability and mutual respect to be able to talk openly with her. before others i was able to be more directly to her and while initially i think this was the result of some fed-up emotions and

a lack of care for what might come of the relationship, the resulting conversations actually made me respect her a lot more and get into her headspace. it's sweet and special and i like that no one has to get it but us

it was really hard when we had to be public and when we had to make ourselves understood to roommates and partners and we manage a lot better when it's just the two of us

sweet but not saccharine, playful but not dreamy, soft but not dull, quiet but not shameful, caring but not captivated

how it feels to go to bed as a librewolf user

can u believe they called me a catgirlboy on discord today i don't even meow

new carveth vid is interesting given my recent discussions on guilt

yknow what actually this is staying in my diary

truth is a very flat metaphor

willow's moderation maxim: better ten thousand teens commit suicide than one school shooter suffer a chat ban

at first i was all like, "mmm, whimsical necropolitics," as a joke. but bro.. i don't think it's a joke anymore

~/.config/discord/settings.json { "SKIP_HOST_UPDATE": true }

courtesy dreary dot dev circa 2023

jetstream2.us-east is sad right now

bro is like 40 minutes in the past

so funny that that was the issue

lesson learned: just be a normie

oh my god lmfaooooo jetstream2 us-east's cursor sucks

erm

post

sob

i think it's time for a new hobby

not "new", but "different"

im ready to be hurt again

i mangled the phrasing because it's more honest, i think i wanna get more acquainted with this dissatisfaction

it's okay for me to be uncomfortable, it's better than being misleading and manipulative

kant was on some shit, even if just as regulative ideal. the constructs don't need to hold up to scrutiny if the gesture of "mere means" has enough rhetorical inspiration

using all my power to stay awake for an hour so i can go cuddle with kasey

limited edition combo name...

ya idk what they were cooking making them redheads

this is a bigger flex archive.org/details/devi...

mhm my release is just the b/w vers but the original drop had color

where'd u find that it looks super familiar but it's not in the english translations i have

this is peak

do u like my new pfp

😈

OH THIS ONE

erm idk which one u mean