read a book + fall in love

bwehhhh i’m failing

is that a fucking blåhaj in pfp

everyone post your timezone so i can figure out how to fit you all in

nice try buddy

tell me about it

she’d kill me 😭

(and also it’s a known fact that this was a tried and failed willow tech)

it’s fine i’m sure you just meant to point out that brueno has other partners too

how’s the backlog coming

lightning cable (me, observing respectfully)

and i’ll do it again too :3

they call me the correct name for meatspace, which is my deadname :3

that's like theoretically true but between kasey's pronoun/name slips irl, my phone bluetooth connecting to her car with the wrong name, etc,, getting to be a bit harder of a sell lmao

idc if they know i have a second life as long as they keep deadnaming me properly

lolll yea convo basically died but idrc abt telling them, i think they gave up on having a normal son a long time ago

aren’t you proud to be apart of it

unforced errors are the spice of life

say hi chat you’re on camera

HAHAHHA FUCK

bro kill me lmao

asldkfjlkasdjf @disarray.sh my mom somehow knew i was going to meet someone from chicago (tbh i dont remember how, the last few weeks have been a blur) and she asked if i stayed in a hotel with you 😭

ok wow there is really not enough time in my day

not that i'll be able to sleep tn, i have so much going on

1day/3day policy isn't cutting it because i keep getting crits

wait aw i love this (also im so sorry i dont know which thread you mean >.>)

oh god my heart is doing flip flops and i don’t know how to respond bc i more or less have an active ollie crush i thought it was off limits so i wanted to respect your space but yeah um you’re like really really cool and i like you a lot >.<

agh i hate men. there are so few nice guys anymore. let me know if you need anything

i’ve got your back honey, maybe just block

is this guy bothering u?

yeah hey asshole, stay away from my queen

what an unbelievably stupid and etiolated model of interpretation

i fucking hate intentionality!!!!

“interpretation is a dance. you can come back later and yield different meaning with new context. but of course there must be an ultimate and blessed interpretation that supersedes the whole exercise, and imbues it with original significance, else art is worthless” intellectually impoverished moron.

nice testes babe

this is a good genre of post

who the hell is haley tho

not sure what’s more problematic at this point, me being a bpd/autism chaser or me being a chaser chaser

check out the kasey tapes folks

unrelated image

still working this out but i’ve recently been reflecting about the role of fantasy in my life. obviously spurred on by strong identification with the schizoid experiences i read about.

i engage in this all the time, but it’s historically been intensely private and sensitive about it. an old blog post described it partially:

i still have these fantasies of interaction, and i wasn’t kidding the other day when i said one-sided intimacy/affection is my hobby. i particularly enjoy mediating my fantasies through associating objects, ex:

but that’s kinda the thing. over time i’ve started to be my vocal about such fantasies, and i’ve started using that as an avenue to make apprehensive inroads to more direct connection.

sometimes that takes the form of direct confession of my emotional state with regards to a person, sometimes the more impersonal publishing of thoughts to bsky, with more or less specificity.

which maybe means i’m in somewhat of a transitional state? or maybe i’m just settling into a new compromise. because i still have these vivid fantasies, but i use those reflections and emotions to fuel real relationships, somewhat relinquishing control and undermining the protection of distance.

crucially though i can choose what to withhold and so can retain that power, so im not sure what to make of that. everything is far too in flux for me to make any strong prescriptions about this behavior, so i suppose im just taking note and monitoring for now.

so yeah anyways thanks to everyone for being patient with me while i learn and experiment

😭😭 no you’re right, that was the joke