i'm going insane writing a book report in n0's comment section about marx every month, it has to end here

i keep editing the second post over and over again; i hope i got it to be a good place now

the tricky bit about SNLT is that it's the measure for abstract labor, which is predicated upon generalized commodity production, and concrete labor is merely the manifestation of abstract labor. SNLT isn't just a way to dodge mudpies, it's integral to understanding how and why capitalism works.

the only reason why concrete labor takes place at all is to be the mediated form of abstract labor, which is the way capital gets valorized. in this way, random expenditure of human powers (i.e. mudpies) isn't even concrete labor as such,

when are the irl devs gonna drop the dark mode texture pack for the sky

early 2000s art fascinates me so much, it feels like it has its own weltanschauung that existed for such a small blip, one that I cherish

The mood that it arose out of actually probably had a lot to do with it occurring prior to the housing crisis lol, and why it’s impossible to get recapture (which is not something I desire anyway)

i really wanna re-read Capital and Postone, but i haven't really been in a reading mood for a while :/

And more Hegel and Adorno and Freud and Foucault and deleuze/guittari and Heidegger and Wittgenstein and… and… and…

i'm actually really really socially inept it's a problem lol

was i previously better at this? or just always awful

it feels worse somehow even tho i've clearly struggled with it for a long time

maybe i'm just really really out of practice with the specific type of overwatch bro convo context, idk

they tried rly hard to include me but idk lmao im just super bad at succinctly expressing myself

i had my mic muted for most of the recording (but not in actual comms) and listening back without my voice is very comforting

i just want to listen, i don't want to be there. i don't like my presence or inclusion, leave me out

i'm starting to think i have a problematic relationship with food :o

I don’t love Answer in Progress’s particular brand of quirk, but at least they try to do the reading. So many “video essayists” will just confidently assert things about entire fields of study they have no familiarity with. Pls god make it stop, or at least be more self-aware and less arrogant.

Also holy shit I worked like 10 hours today even after work all I can think about is work wtf is wrong w me

I mean it makes sense, more material for brain to process and reflect on, but still it’s really ick

Today I was saved by the ambiguity of my customer and advisor having the same first name - I’m such an idiot lol

What the fuck does corporate speak even mean? What “deliverables” are implied by a “deep dive”? I’m going to kill you

update about some of the twinks in question: 1) not nearly as cute irl vs online, photos out of date 2) weird laugh (and constantly laughing) 3) talks really loudly all the time, very aggressive 4) eats gross yes i am a professional h8r

its more fun to fantasize anyway

unstable vs stable modifications lol

i could go for the low hanging fruit that looks scary to illustrate this, but let's be real no one is changing how the little smiley face looks

modifying css is super comfy, albeit a little bit tedious and fragile in case the site owner changes anything

wish i could do it to mobile apps considering everything is just a web wrapper anyways these days. probably is possible through some method, but more convoluted and jank than through a browser extension, especially on ios. not worth the effort anyways, i hate using my phone.

i need a better intro to comments about my life than "it's funny that...". like, i am genuinely entertained, intrigued, humored by it, but idk if 'funny' really fits, and it's also kinda repetitive. just cold opening and getting directly into description seems wrong tho,

part of the point of commentary is that i evaluate it as cute and enjoyable to reflect upon.

it's funny how different shows/videos have different ideal speeds i settle into. not sure if i can nail down exactly all the factors, but audio balance (specifically dialogue vs. music volume), subtitle reliance, and visual relevance all play a role.

youtube videos easily 2.5x minimum, anime can range from 1.6x to 4x, western tv/movies usually around 2x because of shit balance but can sometimes push it higher.

one time i watched through all of Lain at 8x because 1) i know the dialogue and there isn't much of it, 2) the visuals linger, 3) the flashing is a nice recontextualization method and it was really fun :3

it's actually really nice to go out to restaurants with a friend or friends where they eat and i just get to hang out. i've been able to experience that a fair amount in the past half year and i can think of a few reasons why i appreciate it:

- one of the only social activities where it's socially acceptable for the main mental stimulation to just be one another's company. i prefer just to chat, but some people can get bored or think its weird to not be doing Something. i hate activities. this way, they get an activity and i get my convo

- slower pace of interaction, and breaks are acceptable. food is an activity for downtime in conversation and people aren't weird about it. i have more time to put my thoughts together while they eat.

- when with multiple people, i get more chances and opportunities to talk. if i'm really into a topic, i can engage lots of people at once and i can dominate the convo without it being so much of an imposition

- anthropology/sociology thing that ppl are comfy and let their guard down when eating - kinda this inherently trust building ritual, really cute

i think the reason i have been so emotionally impressed by this is because previously, my family and friends got really weird with me not eating. probably because they knew me pre-eating disorder, or at least were around when it arose.

super judgemental and worried about me the entire time, blegh. it's nice to be around ppl that can just be like "oh that's just what she's like" and move on.

of course, there are still lots of drawbacks: - it's still food lol, can be really gross to watch and smell and be around. especially if its meat.

- still going out. i'm better than i used to be by a long shot, but it's defi not my preference for environment. - sometimes people can use the food or the surroundings as convo inspiration. shallow and dull, kill me

- i feel kinda trapped there, even when i'm uncomfy. ig i've never really tried to leave in the middle, but that kinda supports my point

Also, it's not just the awareness, but the intense interest he shows in the internal lives of those around him. It's exceptionally entertaining and sometimes compulsively motivating for him - that's like half the content of the show! Rationalists (TM) don't affix their attention like that.

they keep trying to force House into this scientism box when he's so clearly not. Rationality Bros don't have the emotional intelligence to psychoanalyze that well. it's fine most of the time, but there are several moments where it's clear the writers were directly referencing

a character trait list and plugged Reddit Atheist Rationalism into the episode's context. Even when it is present it's not so big of a deal - it's usually an issue of degree not kind, and Hugh Laurie does a good job of running with it regardless.

To clarify on the emotional intelligence angle, he's clearly *aware* of the various motivations and emotions people can have, even if he doesn't respect them. But sometimes the writing forgets that and writes a more one-dimensional character instead.

But beyond that, even on an emotional dispositional level, it just doesn't fit that well. He's playful, imaginative, self-deluded, all sorts of things that don't fit with the flat and grey rationalism they (the writers and the other characters) try to ascribe to him sometimes.

And you could argue that's clearly one of the main points the show is trying to demonstrate: House's rationalism doesn't work and is internally incoherent. Sure, duh. But at least don't get so heavy handed with your preaching that you undermine your point by so obtusely presenting the opposition.