this is what it's like being a bsky-celeb, you'll have to get used to it dear

elaina how do you have a harem of girls around that will follow your arbitrary command

what i wouldn't give to stand on a fence all day throwing bread back and forth with you.... my womb is all yours <3

if you ever did join, you would see what we named the villager breeder

spreading misery is actually the most compassionate thing one can do

some of you haven't read "Is Sociology a Science of Man?" and it shows

though to be honest, this isn't necessary or the most relevant text; this instance is a simple case of wishful thinking

atcute?

oh yeah i know, im chill now and i wouldnt ever begin medication due to such short-term frustrations

pretty cool right

new tier of gooner brainrot unlocked: minecraft with window transparency while a nukige visual novel autoplays underneath

smh that's just the day it was made available to me

(i'm lying, i was searching far and wide for invite codes [in dumb places tbf], and just when i had given up one of my moots came to the rescue)

unfortunately you weren't lying, you genuinely had those predilections

the bar was in the floor after the night i had okay

tl;dw

have you listened to the follow-up i made the next day where i talk about you (and talk about a hypothetically ideal partner) [context for chat: kasey and i had not seen each other irl for like a year at this point and i'm still caught up on her]

LOL NO SHOT

did i ever tell y'all about the time i went on a bumble date and they stormed out early because i defended AI art

@eris.pet did you know about this

i’ll always be a boy for you 🤍

i’m just balancing it out so i can have good rizz karma when i need it, i already know i have you in the bag

well well well, don’t mind if i do

i sure hope you all don’t find me…

*sniff… sniffle* okay :(

nyoooo don’t step on me i’ll be a good girl

it’s honestly my bad, i should have considered being born a 10/10 french babe at character select instead of this stupid loadout

we all know you’re not a 7.840, there’s no use being modest honey

i’ll need at least a year of refills and some heavy voice training before the lesbian schtick could work

yknow what’s actually fucked up? it would actually be so OP to bring up that i have a gf to 1) establish i am interested in women 2) at least one woman trusts me 3) subtly prompt for reciprocation of relationship status but it doesn’t work bc it implies monogomoid (and clarifying poly is creepo)

im so fucking embarrassed dude im gonna kms i hate being stupid i hate being incapable of reading i hate being so nervous that i speed through things and fuck up fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck

take all the estrogen you want retard, you're still a worthless, angsty, anxious teen boy with no self confidence

the smallest most irrelevant thing in the world. just sucks that i feel like I can't do anything right, and that even if i have the motivation to improve, i don't have the time/energy to do so. though even if i was proficient in substance, i'd still be procedurally retarded. i want to drop out.

tl;dr i'll be fine. until the next thing i screw up completely 😁

i want to die unremarkable

cross-post worthy

motherfucker i got a second 550 i’m gonna kill the united airlines ceo and then myself

the CRJ550 is a terrible aircraft

i’m gonna need to make an edsky acc after this trip to post my fatphobia

genuinely so fucking disgusting. revolting eating habits and the result is malformed creatures unworthy of moral consideration

everyone keeps pestering me and asking if i’ve eaten, tho i spose there’s nothing else interesting going on so i can’t blame them

0.000 🎉🥳

opposite day bsky be like:

one of the main reasons i’m bad at small talk is that i am incapable of speaking about the contingent with those i don’t trust

we are banned from consuming alcohol on business trips 🙃

take it easy mr bad boy, i’m already soaking wet